Cruises.co.uk

Cruises Dot Co Dot UK

http://www.cruises.co.uk/

“Hello and a warm welcome to my avid followers from CruiseDot. In the event any of you have landed on the wrong page don’t worry, one of the latest editions to the blog is a review of  Solent Richard’s recent cruise reviews…

 …both unlikely to be seen on the cruiseDot site:  a 14 night adventure of Star Clipper…

https://solentrichardscruiseblog.com/2017/11/04/star-clipper-java-sea-limited-edition-cruise/

…sailing from Bali to Singapore.

 

 

 and earlier in the year, on the World’s highest rated cruise ship, Europa 2: here’s the link…

https://solentrichardscruiseblog.com/2017/04/07/europa-2-asian-island-explorer/

 

**************************************

STOP PRESS

There would appear to be an omission on the current forum pages.

A member who is normally in the habit of writing excellent live reports and blogs has gone AWOL which is a great pity as Wansbrough is without any doubt  the top blogger on the cruiseDot forum.

While another member is currently on the MSC Seaview Inaugural cruise his offerings are not of the Wansbrough standard of live reporting.

 

CruiseDot members who wish to catch up with Wansbrough’s excellent daily pieces are invited to follow the link…

http://www.wansbroughs-cruise-blog.me.uk/2018/06/msc-seaview-inaugural-cruise-preamble/

********************************************

For years SolentRichard has  suspected that a series of ‘private messages’ are exchanged  on  Monday mornings,  between various CruiseDot members,  with the sole purpose of giving Solent Richard something to write about. Hence the latest editions to this popular lampoon series….   How Dare They and  ‘What is the Point

, Are the Natives are getting Restless?  and When is the seaside not the seaside?

 

In Praise of Garfield – the Outing of Neil Down

Following his close shave with neighbour Smith7 aka Playmate JollyJill, Solent Richard’s old sparring partner, Garfield, is to be congratulated in following in the shoes of the said Solent Richard.

While rumours and questions abounded on the Q&A site as to the forum patriarch’s recent cruising record (and questions seemed to be regularly avoided by you-know-who) it was left to garfield’s mischievous streak to go full on with the question on the open forum…

 

Garfield initially wrote…

“Neil, clearly you’re sulking as your post has not received the response that you’d hope for. Perhaps it is clear that a good number of users on this forum are fed up with posts that aren’t relevant to cruising, and when politically themed threads happen anyone who doesn’t agree with a core group of left-leaning, remain supporting writers they are effectively shouted down and attempts are made to belittle them”.

…followed by the cleverly if sarcastically worded…

“Poor old Neil…
I shall call you Don Quixote from now on as you’re intent on tilting at windmills.
I think maybe we should start crowd funding on the forum to send you on a cruise as it would seem you haven’t been on one for a while.

Regards
A very concerned Garfield”

Now that really touched a nerve and 35 minutes after garfield’s crowdfunding post all was revealed…

“Ida and myself have not been well enough to cruise since April 2016….”

My word, that’s two years past and who’d have thought that Neil Down would have something in common with the Sockpuppet Queen, Diva18 who also seems to have given up on the cruising world.

When is the seaside not the seaside?

One can only imagine that CruiseDot were truly grateful when Smith7 took the hump from the rebellious ‘playmates’ forum  and decided once again it grace a forum she once criticised so intensely.

Particularly, as if one would believe, she is now a member of the ‘seaside’ community in Hampshire.

 

As Jolly Jill we had the tumultuous fanfare announcement heralding the abandonment of Crayford (no doubt much to the delight of the local constabulary)  and her and Plunky’s new  ensconcement at the seaside…

 

“Well thanks to our fellow cruising mates sevenseascoaster aka Wen and her hubby, we have made the giant leap from being city dwellers to living near the sea”.

CruiseDot members will of course recognise ‘Wen’ as Seacoasters, Hampshire.

Five pages of drivel followed, including the usual sarcastic comments about the possibility of the move being to Lee on the Solent: the likes of which regular readers have come to expect from the mates  Stirling resident bore, old Jimmy 5 Chins.

For months readers not on the ‘Private message’ circuit could only speculate where this particular seaside haven along the Hampshire coast actually was.

As we all know you just can’t keep the Queen of Drivel down and when a co-conspitator sent SR a link 17 months after the famous move, all was revealed…

Yep, Garfield… “especially as we are practically neighbours”

But, Garfield claims to live in Waterlooville which is almost 12 miles from the nearest seaside.

What on earth can the girl be on?

Well if that revelation was embarrassing the next one just piles on the old proverbial.

When CruiseDot’s Carol from Welwyn Garden,  opened a thread on ‘Lanyards’ little did she realise the mirth it would give this column

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/forum/673-cruise-chat/49921-lanyards.html?highlight=lanyards

Step forward Jolly Jill’s new bestest friend, and the CruiseDot forum’s resident Matriarch – aka Mrs M –  to offer an early rebuttal with a glorious statement only she could make…

“I’m with the ”tacky” brigade I’m afraid”

Lymington Lizzie wasn’t much kinder either. Splutter, splutter, Solent Richard’s coffee all over the keyboard.

 

Are the Natives are getting Restless?

Well it would certainly appear so. A relatively  small band of members have such a reliance on the website for their social life that any disruption almost borders on a call to the samaritans.

Witness today, 30 April 2018, kicking off with threats to ‘Bow Out’ over the antiquated format of the site.

CruiseDot should thank their lucky starts that the weirdo Glaswegian spinster is the other side of the world: she’d definitely have something to say in Jocky Japanese.

But not is all lost. There is a new forum on the Block. Well, one that is being rebuilt with modern technology and which specialises in proper cruising chat and not just JollyJill type drivel. Dedicated cruisers should give it a try…

http://crowsnestonline.net/forum/

 

“What a load of Tosh”.

Well it had to happen didn’t it. The amazing disappearing thread…

Regular followers of CruiseDot may well have noticed that without warning a thread,  that was originally sat between the ‘The Adult Aurora’ topic initiated at 10.13 0n 21 February  and the ‘Tool Cruise’ topic initiated at 09.51 0n 22 February, suddenly disappeared.

Solent Richard was reliably informed that the said disappearing thread had been an assertion by an obviously sensitive soul that the forum rules had been broken and launched a rather vitriolic attack on member ‘Garfield’…

Needless to say the Admin, while removing the thread from the ‘Topic List’ but failed to remove it from the inner system. It can be found here…

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/980-grumbles/49839-off-topic-forum-rule-1-a.html

And Garfield’s crime? He’d apparently questioned whether or not Toshtosh, aka Tony, had been a teacher.

In all probability he probably was. One can only imagine it was in needlework judging by the easy manner the poor lad was offended.

Of course that wasn’t the end of it and while subsequent comments, before the Admin woke up, indicated that poor Tony wasn’t as popular as he thought he was. As one half of the forum’s ‘Leftie Love-in’ he’s not averse to dishing it out himself but is obviously averse to a little ‘robust’ debate. So having backed himself into a corner a short 5 day sulk ensued while the toys were reinstated to the pram.

Meanwhile there were some interesting comments written before the thread was closed. The best humorous one being from the forum’s only real cruise blogger Wansbrough…

A snowflake just about sums it up while it was good to see Donna hankering after the SR days.

 

Coming soon…. Neil Down’s delusional nightmare and the Jolly Jill question of the year…“When is the seaside not the seaside”

Readers can also skip the next introductory paragraph by clicking the following links to the latest updates: though it really is recommended reading in order to understand the broader history and aspects of this particular forum.

 

 

Oh Dear Never Mind

They just don’t Get It

Welcome to Vanity Fair

Neil’s continuing Conundrum

2017 What does the future hold

2016 End of Year Report

2016 Festive Round-Up

Who do they think they are?

Send for the Samaritans

The 2016 Forum Cruise

Wakey Wakey CruiseDot

Come back James

 

Once regarded as the  Uk’s most popular web based cruise related forum  with thousands of members and a reasonable array of cruising experience that spanned most cruise lines, Cruise Dot –  as it is commonly referred to – has degenerated into  a shadow of it’s former self. On a good day  CruiseDot is capable of giving the likes of the ‘playmate and Cruise-Community forums a run for their money but this is generally due to the incredible amount of non cruising (Off Topic) irrelevance produced by its members.

Alas even the challenge of the more progressive and slicker Bolsover Cruise Forum has failed to generate any worthwhile challenge to the all dominant Cruise Critic and various Facebook cruising group sites.

Run as a commercial venture CruiseDot  nevertheless led  the way in UK ‘cruise chatter’ and on many occasions shared invitations to visit ships with its members: as opposed to other cruise travel agents who pass similar invites solely to their staff.  A number of complimentary cruises and ship visits are also often offered on an irregular basis in return for a ‘daily’ blog though recently the cruise blogs are being more frequently subscribed by staff.

Off topic subjects are allowed and  they have in the past been both lively and  healthy. Unfortunately it is now the ‘off cruise topics’ that really dominate the site – a measure of either a general lack of cruising knowledge and experience or, a more likely explanation, because so many members rely on it as their social life blood.

The forum certainly  appears to be drifting towards  becoming another ocean going version of Facebook similar to the UK’s Cruisingmates site – with the only difference being it has a slightly larger  regular core, around 25/30 members,  making the running. The casual visitor may be forgiven for thinking that it is another branch of NHS Direct: such is the number of ‘ailment‘ and ‘medical sympathy’ seeking contributions.

Moderation appears flexible though is sometimes erratic,  not helped by staff changes and rotations.  Technological issues have led to continued membership frustration. It is all well and good claiming to allow a high level of freedom of content but this, in reality, is not always the case. When a recent comment by a ‘one issue’  member contained strong criticism of a  rival internet cruise agent, attempts to respond to the criticism, by a member of the abused agency, was met with an administrative measure that effectively blocked any further response or defence . Highly unethical in the opinion of this blog.

The forum started with such promise but, in the opinion of this blog, failed to  live up to initial  expectations. This has led to a strong core of experienced cruisers heading for alternative forums and a number of dedicated ‘closed’ facebook pages like ‘Cruise People’

https://www.facebook.com/groups/thespartanline/permalink/245012928983204/

…and ‘The Original Cruise Lovers Connection’

https://www.facebook.com/groups/404507519660884/permalink/439369629508006/

…and ‘We Are Cunard Fanzine‘…

https://www.facebook.com/groups/336212489853606/

 

Meanwhile the CD site continues with technical problems and,  despite numerous complaints from the membership, including some pretty powerful ones…

Clicking the following links will direct the reader to specific topics…

May Quote of the Month

No fond Farewell

How Dare They

Oh the impertinence of Scandic of Harrogate who dared question the management on open forum…

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/673-cruise-chat/49467-free-berlitz-cruise-guide-doing-review-impossible-obtain-despite-promise.html

“Anybody else owed a Berlitz Guide for writing a review?

I’ve been trying to get mine for weeks now, but all requests are just ignored.

Is this just another scam”?

 

It certainly didn’t go down too well with the Patriarch who was onto Scandic’s case almost immediately…

“No it is not a scam. Quite often these books are sent out in batches so if you have just missed a deliver it can mean a longer wait. I have known times when they have waited for the new edition so that you get an up to date version. On the whole they are worth waiting for and the information in them is pretty good with sometimes a mistake that some of the regular cruisers will find.

I have had at least one guide since 1996 and even had my ugly face on a few versions so I am a little biased. Anyway just hang on or drop a hint to the workers and it will arrive. …..Neil”

There you have it then. The Patriarch has earned at least one guide in 21 Years. And still he hasn’t answered the Q&A site question ...”when did Neil Down last cruise”

Of course it’s all very well for the Patriarch to criticise the CD management and Admin…

…but woe betide anyone other upstart. Not sure about the afore mentioned  Abysmal Quality but certainly abysmal hypocrisy abounds.

Here’s another classic from the Patriarch – or should it be ‘Mystic Meg’

“So it was easy to predict that the Loyalty section would soon stand alone and on its own feet and I, for one, look at what has happened with a smile and a lot of interest. …..Neil”

Can anyone point out where the Patriarch made this prediction? No, neither can he.

Talking of hypocrisy what about member Haworth of Wokingham’s valiant efforts to report back from his cruise onboard  Viking Star. He’s the first paying forum member to sail Viking Ocean even if he’s 2 years behind Solent Richard…

https://solentrichardscruiseblog.com/2015/12/28/viking-star-a-taste-of-something-different/

 

…and apart from the odd favourable comment on the ship and its entertainment there is little else other than sneering remarks.

The fact is of course that, stand fast maybe two members who cruise Cunard Grills and Seabourn, the remainder would find Viking Ocean well out of their league and certainly the quality beyond their comprehension.

While one can always guarantee ‘off topic’ subjects to be more popular than cruising ones, you can also guarantee the forum’s resident ‘Trot’ will find something to sneer at.

And so it was with the announcement of the Royal Engagement. Up pops the Widnes dinosaur with his  usual brainless comment…

“Another one jumps on the Royal gravy train!!!”

Really? Here we have a Royal Prince who has served his country well as an Apache helicopter pilot in Afghanistan and is in the forefront of rehabilitating wounded servicemen, engaged to a self made  American female with littler no airs and graces who herself does immense charitable work.

Of course it’s just typical of what we have come to expect from Mr Widnespewl: the man who removes food on the last day of his cruise to save a few bob at a motorway service station.

 

Maybe he would prefer to see his kindred socialist spirit, Emma Dent Coad, in Buckingham Palace. Read about it here…

 

https://jcreadstheguardian.wordpress.com

What is the Point

Or of course this update could also be entitled…’What is the Purpose?’

Regular readers will not be surprised when Solent Richard once again turns his attention towards the ‘Queen of Drivel’, aka Jolly Jill, aka Smith 7, aka Perismo: all depending which cruise forum one reads.

November on CruiseDot just happened to kick off with this little gem from my favourite playmate and Hampshire neighbour…

 

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/980-grumbles/49376-what-point.html

 

Yet another post in the long series of CruiseDot regular moanfests that the world has come to expect from that backwater of budget cruisers, where it is plainly obvious the owners of CruiseDot don’t give a stuff for the vanity of the small circle of their core members.

Jolly Jill wrote

After years of the odd news bulletin from cruisedot, I have recently been receiving them on an almost daily basis.

The problem is, they are a total waste of time for those of us that can’t access any of the links.

It makes no sense does it”?

…and Judith Cooke responded…

I posted a review this morning. It would not allow me to put in name, address and e-mail. Their way of not sending the guides”?

Meanwhile B&D of Shepton Mallet wrote…

“This has been a bone of contention for some time now…….”

Certainly has dear and pretty fascinating it is too. Of course the management are well aware of the hold they have on the core membership – a small band of some-time cruisers who evidently don’t enjoy a normal life in the real world and are totally reliant on the site for their social life while they find safety and comfort in anonymity and mediocracy.

Frankly they’d be better off playing a recording of ‘Paint Drying’.

One could question what on earth is the worm on in that final clip above…

“I have booked more than 15 cruises with Cruisedot. I phoned a few weeks ago to alert the sales team to the problem with links (for some of us) on the forum. Unfortunately, my usual TA wasn’t available and the person who answered my call hung up when they realised that I wasn’t calling to book another cruise”.

OMG, They hung up. How dreadful. Cause for a police complaint there Jill. In the meantime it is  hoped that the team from Jolly Jill’s  Cruisingmates most favoured cruise agent, Cruise Select, don’t get to see that admission – 15 cruises booked: Wow.

Nevertheless, Solent Richard will soon be delighted to inform Jolly Jill of the delights of a cruise visit to Bali which he knows she will most gratefully appreciate…

 

 

Oh Dear Never Mind

Having highlighted, in the earlier ‘Welcome to Vanity Fair’ update,  the membership’s  gratefulness, vanity and untiring belief that everything about the  CruiseDot organisation is so so wonderful, it must have come as a terrible shock when they learnt that the 2017 Cruise Awards gave top place as Best Cruise Agency to Bolsover Cruise Club…

 

while a check of other winners…

http://awards.cruise-international.com/cruise-international-awards-2017-winners/

…reveals that in the great scheme of things CruiseDot could only manage FIFTH place out of 7…

Wow, down to 5th place: quick, phone the Samaritans, the membership will be devastated.

One cannot of course  help thinking that apart from the terrible technical issues –  that account for upwards of 20% of Forum activity – the forum also suffers from the attendance and demented scribblings of one or two semi literate socialist dinosaurs.

Here’s a recent offering from the initial sake of the great man himself…

He writes…“Momentum is made up of thousands of disillusioned young ones (not thugs)…”

In the eyes of the wannabe Liverpudlian momentum are obviously angels and not socialist thugs. No doubt the boyo believes it was the wicked TOOOORIES who bricked Angela Eagle’s Merseyside office when she challenged Jeremy Corbyn for the leadership…

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3686082/Hours-challenging-Jeremy-Corbyn-Labour-leadership-Angela-Eagle-s-office-BRICKED-Labour-civil-war-turns-nasty.html

And one wonders who was responsible for the human images hanging in Manchester at the start of the Conservative Conference last week…

 

Of course the guy has form when it comes to untruths. A bit like many of his socialist cohorts. But to try and make out that Momentum is full of youth really takes the biscuit: this kid is in total denial.

But there, nothing surprises particularly coming from the empty headed big gob with FA to say about real life. Surely  he would be better employed selling big issues outside Morrisons in Widnes: strewth,  what a halfwit and serial loser that guy is.

Perhaps he should change his avatar, here’s one recommendation…

Don’t forget, you can always catch up on the jc antidote store…

https://jcreadstheguardian.wordpress.com

 

 

Welcome to Vanity Fair

It’s been some time since this section of the blog has been updated, mainly due to the fact that the CD Forum has become so mundane that little material of any satirical value has been forthcoming.

The usual pattern continued with the forum patriarch pursuing his weekly rant at the quality of the website, the Matriarch laying down the law while  re-afirming her loyalty and the bulk of threads and comments directed less and less towards serious cruising topics and more towards current affairs and game playing.

Then, all of a sudden, as if all Solent Richard’s Christmases had come at once when the forum equivalent of the relief of Mafeking occurred:  Member Bradbury opened a thread to celebrate the forum’s 8th birthday…

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/529-about-cruise-co-uk-forum/48773-hey-hey-hey-its-forums-birthday-8-yrs.html

What followed was nothing short of an amazing exercise in self promotion vanity from a handful of members covering 7 pages or 63 actual comments.

Not that that the total number of comments can be taken at face value. The Matriarch actually registered 8 of them, 6 went to Smith 7 aka Jolly Jill and the OP managed 5,   while the overall winner was Diva and Jolly Jill’s fellow playmate,  Tracey from East Yorkshire. You couldn’t make it up.

Of far more interest of course was the discussion regarding ‘old’ members who had disappeared. Lists were made and names added of those old ‘stalwarts’, most with valuable cruising records, who no longer use the forum.

Funny that the majority left around the same time as Solent Richard and even more interesting that the majority are now active members of various Facebook groups where the chat is about genuine cruising matters and stories rather than the day to day drivel of life.

Talking of drivel and its place on a cruising forum, two recent  threads  rank highly in the drivel stakes have to be from the drivel queen herself, I hear Thunder…

What a scoop….“I was rudely awoken at 12.30 am by claps of thunder…” and of course, thought her forum friends would like to hear about it.

Meanwhile the second entrant was a fascinating look into the life of other members being  openly offered for discussion with a hypothyroidism thread…

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/766-getting-older/49088-hypothyroidism-weight-gain-loss.html

The only surprise being that the Spud didn’t find time to comment on what most folk consider obesity.

That completes this little update as SR has used his allotted time for a bit of satire for this week. Do tune in again to read his take on the CD Members views on Jane McDonald’s TV show from Viking Sky,  Neil Down’s faux pas call for an embargo on visiting Myanmar and jc’s bloomer on Singapore.

 

It’s all here on he UK’s favourite cruise blog site

They just don’t Get It

It’s relatively easy to see why the CruiseDot site has diminished in popularity. Apart from the appalling technical issues that pervade so many of the membership’s comments there is also a real dearth of what could be referred to as ‘serious active cruisers. Can anyone remember when the Patriarch last cruised? Neil certainly goes to great lengths to avoid the question over on the Q&A site.

The fact is that in reality there are greater discussions on the individual cruise line pages of Cruise Critic than there is for all subjects on the CD site.

And of course not all the information, when it is offered is valid.

Again, even straying from cruising subjects some individuals are just plainly way off course…

” …BoJo isn’t actually all that popular with party members…”

Needless to say the day before, Thursday 28 September,  YouGov published a poll…

Hammy, 1fifthavenue is obviously as up on his politics as he is on cruising.

Then we have the Faux Pas of the month from our old friend the Forum’s patriarch. Who else could sally forth with  a remark that has to be embarrassing and rather  tactless on a forum owned by an company that actually sells river cruises in Myanmar…

‘We are just ordinary people but one thing we can and, in my opinion, should do is to advise any and all possible vacation visitors to that country not to do so. ……Neil”

Whoops. 

Of course, in truth there aren’t that many, if any, forum members who could actually afford to take a river cruise along the Irrawaddy. There was one though…

https://solentrichardscruiseblog.com/2016/03/10/princess-panhwar-on-the-road-to-mandalay/

 

 

Neil’s continuing Conundrum

One can always tell when the gaps between the cruises of the forum’s patriarch are getting longer. There is a tendency to introduce all sorts of threads either haranguing the sites Admin for this or that reason or complaining about the ‘comment useful buttons not being used correctly to afford him the adulation of the cruising public.

The latest craze is to regurgitate, yet again, a discussion on home security which in reality is a veiled attack on those thousands more users who have forsaken boring cruise forums for Facebook….

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/673-cruise-chat/48241-i-want-world-know.html

As usual the thread went ‘off topic’ somewhat with a walk down memory lane recalling forum members who no longer post. Of course months go by and no one misses these folk and then the flood gates open.

Then of course there is the regular creep and troll with  issues who feel it necessary to have a dig at a certain cruise blog. Step forward Pennbank and Spud-u-don’t-like…

An interesting interjection by Pennbank who obviously suffers from a severe dose of envy and has little in his arsenal but attempts to denigrate other people with his pathetic comments.

Certainly Solent Richard knows what his little game is and what his attraction with Cunard is in particular.  But also remember that this is the creep that, on numerous occasions,  has joined roll calls and then never turns up. Well, he turns up but keeps a discreet distance from the group and never identifies himself. All the hallmarks of a professional stalker if ever there was.

Rumour has it that the  membership are eagerly anticipating his views on Malcolm’s latest thread…

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/767-chit-chat/48393-friends.html

…though Solent richard will wager he will resort to type and stay well in the back ground.

Poor John.

So there you have it. The evening of Sunday the 5th March, one at 9.19 pm the other at 11.45. What a wonderful existence they lead.

Of course in The Spud’s case there are more holes in her rant than there are in Gordon Ramsay’s colander. Older forum members will recall it was she who implied that they owned the place in Windsor, and another one on the Gower when they were actually being rented because her old man worked away from Jarrow.

 

What is more to the point of course is that this was her first post since

Nothing since the 25 January? And this is the ‘Mega-Excited’ Blingy walking stick owner who supposedly should have only returned from an Azura cruise on 4th or 5th March and at time of writing this update (19th  April) the world still hasn’t heard a peep on what happened – Not even the cruise Community forum where she raised such a fuss about her excitement…

Surely not…no…

TO BE CONTINUED WITH A PENNBANK RIGHT TO REPLY

Followers of this section of the blog can also update themselves on the antics of the CD forum’s most ridiculed member.. A socialist dinosaur and natural born loser who amuses and entertains the membership with crack-pot political rants.

Why not take a peep at the latest update with ‘Life on Planet Widnes’

https://jcreadstheguardian.wordpress.com

Sometimes you couldn’t make it up…

 

2017 What does the future hold?

That’s a good question. It certainly didn’t take long for the forum’s Patriarch to start a thread…

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/767-chit-chat/48039-we-lost-things-discus.html

Are we so overburdened with life’s troubles?

Has the Christmas/New Year Malaise set in?

Have we nothing new to add to this scintillating Forum?

Nine of the current threads on the page of fifteen threads, before I added this one, are “Word Games” which probably makes it the dullest page for years. 

Maybe it is a good thing that we have these games, I never thought I would ever see me write such a thing,  but what the dickens would it look like without them. 

So well done all you Word Game Admirals of the Fleet for at least sustaining some interest in cruising albeit in a roundabout way. …..Neil”

Of course the question could be asked of Neil… “when was your last cruise and are we getting a review?”

In reality though its the usual old thing, what started as a decent cruise forum has been hijacked by a small coterie whose lives have become dependant on this forum for their daily bread and butter. While cruising happens to be a common link there is little in the way of serious cruise discussion.

 

Whatever happened to the brave new world heralded  all this years ago by Lizzie Lymington? A quick check reveals dear lizzie hasn’t been around for a while…

lizzie-lymington-last-active

Oh dear.

Of course there will surely be an award ceremony along soon that will generate an inordinate amount of back-slapping led by the Matriarch herself. But CrusieDot aren’t the only web based Travel agents to win awards.

 

Solent Richard’s latest TA, Six Star Cruises…

six-star-cruises-award

 

And what price loyalty these days. The grapevine is hot with news of those past customers moving their business to the more likeable and popular  John Campion…

johns-go-cruise-website

Even better if your a member of Facebook, John is on hand to offer a personal service…

johns-facebook-page

 

 

2016 End of Year Report

The year continued in a similar vein as previous years with the usual moans about problems with the website and moans about games players dominating the forum. Unfortunately CruiseDot isn’t immune from the fact that the majority of its members lack any broad or serious cruising experience, are usually interested in cost cutting and cheap choices, and of course, lack any real meaningful life, social or otherwise. The amount of drivel, game players  and off topic subjects amply supports this theory.

Indeed, a fine illustration…

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/767-chit-chat/47888-nice.html

“My friends relative has just won this years Apprentice.

She actually messaged me this morning to thank me for being so nice…”

Of course, this let the cat out of the bag for poor Nick _C of Worthing…

nick-cs-start-anger-at-carol-giving-apprentice-result-away

…who had the audacity to complain.

You guessed it. The sisterhood, led by the forum matriarch, sprang into action…

mrs-m-response-to-nick-cs-jibe

“You have just been rather unpleasant to one of the nicest members of the forum” she wrote.

Poor Nick, lesson learn’t, don’t tangle with the sisterhood.

Meanwhile, on a not too dissimilar theme, congratulations to my old mate jc for his perception in exposing that old fraud and Glaswegian weirdo, Annie…

jc-catches-annie-out

Good to see someone not just paying attention but being prepared to challenge. The lad is obviously better at spotting frauds than playing politics, as his webpage will testify…

https://jcreadstheguardian.wordpress.com

And hey, no sisterhood response. Kinda tells a story really. Illegitimi non carborundum

2016 Festive Round-Up

Not unlike a clutch of other UK cruising forums the level of genuine cruise related activity on the CruiseDot site remains woeful.

Hence a recent appeal by the forum’s self styled father  and Patriarch figure, Neil Down, bemoaning the fact that the level of new topics remains abysmal…

 

only-4-new-topics

That 6th line probably hit the nail on the head because slowly but surely the majority of members who possessed a modicum of real cruising experience have long  abandoned this particular forum and there really is a limit to what budget cruisers can talk about.

A prime example was a recent report of a cruise on board Viking Star by Harry, Hastings. A great report albeit one year after Solent Richard’s review on the same ship…

https://solentrichardscruiseblog.com/2015/12/28/viking-star-a-taste-of-something-different/

…and of course, well out of the range of the majority of members: hence the little response.

On a brighter note it would appear that two members have returned to the fold having abandoned the even duller Cruisingmates forum. High expectations are expected from Wansbrough who cruises to a high standard though the forum can brace itself for Smith7’s, aka playmate Jolly Jill, 77 day ‘porthole’ review on Boudicca: providing of course this cruise isn’t curtailed as the last one was…see 2016 Festive Round-UP on…

https://solentrichardscruiseblog.com/2013/04/26/cruising-mates/

Otherwise the only excitement to report in this festive update is the matter of a certain member (Islandgirl) having the audacity to challenge the patronage of the Forum’s Matriarch…

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/980-grumbles/47835-i-would-most-certainly-if-i-could-6.html   Comment # 56 and 61…

 

accusation-bitchygate

No doubt the ether was all abuzz with  PMs and emails flashing hither and thither between the sisterhood, all discussing this Island upstart.

How dare she refer to a Queens Griller as being bitchy. Tut,tut.

By way of a casual observation, one would have thought that the matriarch’s time could be better spent getting on with organising the 2017 Forum Cruise. It’s definitely gone a little quiet on that front.

It’s surely a trifle ironic then that while the CruiseDot forum continues it’s downward slide one past member with an exemplary cruising record has seen, since his departure from the forum, his blog move from strength to strength and has now received an award from…

http://blog.feedspot.com/cruise_blogs/

cruise-50-transparent_1000px

Congratulations also to Duncan whose ‘Duncan Writes’ also features in the awards.

And finally a very Merry Christmas to all my readers from the CruiseDot Forum. Stick around for forthcoming ‘live’ reviews from  Queen Mary 2 and P&O’s Oceana: plus a return cruise aboard Europa 2 and something a little different, Star Clipper.

Happy Cruising Christmas…

christmas-cruising-card

Who do they think they are?

 

Imagine Solent Richard’s mirth when he arrived home from his Seabourn Sojourn cruise to a fellow conspirator’s email alerting him with a link to yet another CruiseDot Forum member’s most recent – in a series  – of moans regarding the Administration of this once good forum.

Step forward the forum’s patriarch, the indefatigable Neil Down…

chuntering-away-to-themselves

“I have often felt that what is said and the concern with which some articles are written on here, The Forum, show that we care but that we are just chuntering away to ourselves”.

Spot on there Neil. One can only wonder however why it has taken so long for either you or any other member with any real cruiing experience, to work that out.

Any semblance of serious debate and discussion long left those pages as they became a playground for games players, the odd troll and a few women who have nothing else in their lives other than chat with a degree of anonymity  from behind a keyboard.

The Cd forum has gone the same way as the playmates forum…

https://solentrichardscruiseblog.com/2013/04/26/cruising-mates/

who don’t even bother to list who is online at any given time: the figures are that dire while the Cruise Community site offers little better, a group of a dozen who spend more time ‘off topic’ than they do on cruising.

Thank God for Cruise Critic and the Facebook groups.

Send for the Samaritans

 

September saw shock waves reverberating around the forum when a member reported that agent John Campion was leaving. The first that was heard of this monumental event was when clients of Agent John received emails from other agents informing them their accounts had arbitrarily transferred to agent xyz.

screen-shot-2016-10-24-at-11-05-45

Well done ‘All at Sea’ for the prompt OP which obviously caught one or two of John’s loyal supporters who are still reading from the other staff hero departure first reported  on this blog…

<a href=”#James1″>Come back James</a>

but not discussed on the open forum

For two days (22 posts) the expected and usual tea-towel platitudes were forthcoming. Poor Mrs M must be devastated: at least 5% of her myriad of offerings sang the praises of CruiseDot’s equivalent of the ‘special one’.

Then there were the other hilarious snippets.

Smith 7, aka Jolly Jill on Playmates, (remember her calling the CD Admin ‘desperate’ from the safety of CM’s lounge?), who recently admitted, following a Wendy Woo costing exercise and revelation on this blog, that she had paid well over the odds for her Far East cruise in November. One can only surmise Agent John’s glee as he banked the commission.

Of course there is a possibility that the  luvvies could soon be re-united with Agent John: word reaches Solent Richard that GoCruise may be a place to watch. Remember, you heard it here first.

 

Then the Spud -u-like with her offering….”I was exchanging emails with John all morning yesterday.” One wonders whether Agent John was the same agent that spuddy has been vilifying on the ‘cruise Community’ forum having got her Azura fly-cruise air preferences all wrong?

john-farewell

And then that little gem from the OP regarding the Forum cruise that doesn’t seem to be happening…”Thanks Mrs M for your answer, seems Cunard are missing a trick”.

Cunard missing a trick?  They’ll more likely be thrilled not to have to watch all those wine boxes being embarked and the subsequent bar sales increase.

Talking of the Forum Cruise, there must be a very limited choice if Cunard and P&O are out of consideration. All the others will confiscate the wine boxes. Somehow one detects a distinct lack of enthusiasm. Anyone offering odds on it not happening?

And Agent John’d departure looks as though it isn’t the only subject that will keep the Samaritans busy.

Anyone who wonders how such a promising cruise forum fell from grace so quickly, they need look no further than this little gem…

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/767-chit-chat/47622-who-watching.html

 

WHO IS WATCHING

“Hi Every one

I just wondered, who all the people are that view a thread, but don’t comment. Some threads have over a 1000 views but only 20 or 30 comments.

Political threads seem to get the most response, with cruising threads often getting the least”.

Well, Er yes.

Aptly summed up of course by one of the more brighter members…

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/767-chit-chat/42799-so-few-opinions.html?highlight=post+count

Comment # 2…

“A good question.

The forum went through a phase where some people thought things were too robust or argumentative, but the numbers contributing were much higher when that was the case”. 

One prime example is of course this question that recently appeared…

Private excursions in Bali, Indonesia.

“Hi everyone. We are doing some research for our forthcoming S.E Asia cruise next month. 
We like to book private excursions with local people if we can and wondered if anyone could advise on excursions in Bali.

We have found a company online called ‘with locals’ who do a 2 day package but only charge for the driver, leaving us unsure about how much cash we will need during the 2 days.

Any advice would be most welcome. I am asking on the forum rather than the Q & A pages because it’s easier.

Jill”

Wow, 660 hits but only 9 responses: of which 3 were from the OP herself.

Perhaps Jolly Jill should ask the question on Cruise Critic where one of their members could have offered a comprehensive response. After all, Solent Richard has visited bali twice in the last 3 years and is scheduled a cruise visit in 2017…

richard-on-kuta-beach

That’s him on Kuta Beach. There is so much to do and see on the island of Bali but of course, you do have to put your hand in your pocket.

 

The 2016 Forum Cruise

 

Congratulations are due on the unmitigated success of the 2016 CruiseDot Forum Cruise on Queen Mary 2 earlier this month.

And a big well done to the Forum’s Matriarch, Mrs M, for her steadfast perseverance in plugging the event to the extent the pre cruise hype reached a staggering 32 pages (316 comments) before ending like a damp squid with just 5 post cruise comments.

Equally of importance was the fact that the UK’s self proclaimed largest membership forum  managed to increase their attendance over last years ocean going soiree by a whopping 12.5%:  or in simple terms 9 members as opposed to 8 last year.

So one can well understand however that a thread by Hawkinsmg, proclaiming that she had become a grandmother (? Does that pass the ‘so what’ test on an essentially cruising forum),  proved far more popular amongst the membership.

Of course the purists on the forum will declare that there was a ‘review’ elsewhere and thanks must go to the well respected blogger Duncan for that for, without him, little would be heard of the high time on the high seas. That at least hit the 60 comment mark which included Duncan’s live blogs from the cruise.

Equally interesting to note was that on another forum, who actually had three members attending this cruise, the same Duncan thread reached over 40 comments plus separate reviews of the stateroom and remastering.

Any reason for this? Well a clue to the answer  may just be hidden on a rival forum with a comment…

“Yes, sorry. Mrs. M warned me that Plunky is anonymous and I wasn’t sure whether to mention him or not!”

Mrs M warned? Anonymous? Really? The Matriarch taking on the role of censor. How many other attendees did M arbitrarily airbrush out?

You couldn’t make it up.

Of course, on that other forum someone with an axe to grind couldn’t resist a swipe at the Matriarch…

“Mrs M? Who is Mrs M? Is she a member of CM?”

Good old Tomvet, The gift that keeps on giving.

Meanwhile, and well worth a mention because it is linked with the original thread, was a comment by the forum’s resident trot and all round dimwit, jc…

“Have a good cruise everyone.Keep an eye out in Le Manche on Sat night for Britannia.
I’ll be on the top deck waving my little Union flag.
JC”

Not the sharpest knife in the box is the member for Widnespewl and obviously geography is another subject he ain’t hot on.

As can be seen from the two ship’s comparable courses on that Saturday early evening, there was zero chance of any mutual flag waving.

Wakey Wakey CruiseDot

Yet another sign that all is not well over on the CruiseDot with the Forum’s patriarch, Neil down, openly calling for action…

Bizarrely Neil and many other members obviously still live under the illusion that this is ‘their’ forum and that the company actually pays attention to what they say.

WRONG. It is a marketing tool and always has been, hence nine pages and 89 comments later the Admin continued to ignore the thread.

Even more bizarrely some of the membership even believe that they would maybe be entrusted to act as moderators. Can anyone imagine these anonymous folk, afraid to even show their true faces, be entrusted to invigilate others comments?

Needless to say one or two brave members produced comments somewhat unfavourable towards the Admin and, quick as a flash, the forum’s resident matriarch, the rather fragrant Mrs M, sprung to the company’s defence…

…followed by a full blown ticking off to those who dared air a comment…

Well done Annie, Glasgow and Topdeck for having the gall to question the system.

Meanwhile of course this was the same matriarch who, on 5 May,  commented…

“…blogs are an integral part of the forum…”

Really? Would that be the same Mrs M who in June sailed around Britain on Queen Elizabeth, no doubt in a Grill Suite, and though she was posting almost daily  on the forum, never once mentioned anything about the cruise or life onboard, let alone dining with Cunard Facebook Fanzines while visiting Liverpool.

Truly incredible …and unlike Mrs M to be shy.

While on the subject of Admin not giving a hoot, readers may recall the case of the banned member Tomvet returning under the new Pseudonym, FamilyGuy Bailemagash. He then volunteered  and was selected for the visit to MSC Splendida. Solent Richard understands that a number of members raised objections and eventually Administrator Rachael removed him from the list while giving the assurance that FamilyGuy would again be banned. Despite those assurances FamilyGuy’s screen name remains on the board as a full member.

Stop Press: (15 July 2016) In another example of the power of the internet, and after a degree of  pressure by this blog,  it is pleasing to report that the CD Admin have at last taken action and Tomvet, aka the troll FamilyGuy, has once more been banned…

About time too.

Come back James

An interesting rumour has landed on the desk of Solent Richard. It concerns the possible use of a sock puppet- not unusual for a number of members – by a member previously banned from the CruiseDot forum.

It transpires that today, 31st May, the CruiseDot forum announced the winners of their MSC Splendida Balcony competition and that possibly a banned member, using another sock puppet was selected.

Information received, and Solent Richard stresses it is still an infant rumour, indicates that a certain ‘Familyguy’ may just not be all that he seems…

That’s him last on the list. Watch this space folks because who do you think is predicting a Splendid cruise soon?

Yes, you’ve guessed right at position 14) – none other than the cruisingmates/playmates Walter Mitty  character, and previously banned member Tomvet. The lad even had the gall to announce it on the CM Forum…

CruiseDot Splendida competition update: 2 June...

Well what a difference 48 hours make…

Oh dear. It would appear ‘Familyguy‘ has been replaced by a TBA.

Presumably the acronym for ‘To be Avoided

Solent Richard has often remarked on Tomvet’s limited intelligence so did he really imagine he could pull this off. As long ago as November 2014 the Irish meat inspector, and part time bag carrier for EU officials, had been sussed out…

And thanks again to Wilba, with the support and assistance of  Mrs M,  Annie,  Tracey and other ladies,  Rachal at CruiseDot in sussing out another cruisingmate sock puppet who had already been banned for his female harassing comments. Looks like a quick edit may be required…

 

Solent Richard is really looking forward to the conversation between Mrs M and Jolly Jill on the QM2 in July when the subject of JJ’s Facebook friend Tomvet crops up. After all, what was that Mrs M posted on the MSC Splendida thread…

 

One can only assume that Familyguy will not be reviewing MSC Splendida soon, if ever, and particularly not on CruiseDot’s forum. Now what was that about “being the gift that keeps on giving“?

Indeed, with Tomvet as an example, one sometimes wonders how do you get to be a playmate?

Is there some sort of exam you need to fail?

Now we come to the crux of the matter though. Had James Crossland still been running the show Familyguy (aka the banned Tomvet) would also be showing a ‘Banned Member’ status under his screen name.

It would appear that Rachel is somewhat hesitant in taking this action which is puzzling. She knows who Familyguy is: what’s keeping her.

Even more puzzling is that to date there are no comments on the thread regarding the changes.

Have members been subject to an embargo notice?

Watch this space.

*************************************************************************

Never one to resist a side swipe at  CruiseDot, though always from a safe distance, member Smith 7, aka Jolly Jill of playmate fame, had a go…

Solent Richard is curious as to the difference between ‘dross’ and ‘drivel’ but at least it has now been officially recognised.

But has it. ‘The man who took my booking’?

Hmnnn, funny that on ‘home ground’ the Queen of Drivel chose to name that man…

Double standards? You couldn’t make it up.

What is infinitely more amusing though is that she who claims to be so careful with the pennies and thoroughly researches future cruises, and assuming she paid the £4,999.00 flyer price for a sky suite,  fell for that somewhat overpriced package obviously seduced by the ‘whistlestop’ pre-cruise element. Excellent piece of marketing by CruiseDot though should have tried Cruise Nation

http://www.cruisenation.com/fusion/detailcruise3.pl?sessionkey=AE30E6F6-1C8Ei43FA-9919-004A61FF4447&chosencruise=225_0.0&depselected=&cid=1032861&depair=CO#cabingrades-tab

Sky Suite and 2 night Singapore stay….£2,099.00

Wendy Wu 12 day tour Vietnam and Cambodia…£1890.00 (less UK flights of course)

Stay tuned folks…

Vietnam

https://solentrichardscruiseblog.com/2014/12/29/far-eastern-trilogy-part-2-good-morning-vietnam/

Siem Reap

https://solentrichardscruiseblog.com/2015/03/09/siem-reap-one-way-to-do/

 

And so back to the complaints. Yet another thread started by the old sage and forum veteran, Neil Down…

Neil Down Word game rant

…and…

 

Neil Down Games rant 22 April

Be careful what you wish for Neil. It could all be about children, grandchildren and what ailments one now has – I guess you know where I’m talking about.

Of course the real problem with some of these so called forums is they don’t have the genuine cruising membership anymore and have become virtual ‘social talking shops’ for those who don’t have a real life. The real cruisers have all upped sticks and joined the Facebook cruising groups where trolls are eliminated by virtue of the fact you need an identity.

This site has seen such a fall in numbers online it had to adjust the parameters of ‘how many members are online at any given time. Where it used to be ‘actually’ online it now logs them in for 24 hours to give the illusion there are greater numbers online. Two screen shots from earlier this morning (09.24) prove my point…

members on line 25 April 2016

There is no way 809 members were ‘currently’ online as the superimposed example shows.

It’s a similar story over in Whitstable. Your old mate Dave has been reduced to completely removing his members online statistic box, so embarrassing were the figures.

Having said that one particular thread over there appears to be getting more than its fair share of attention and is making ‘headlines’ on Facebook. One wonders how long the ‘Master & Commander takes before removing it..

http://www.cruisingmates.co.uk/forum/viewtopic.php?f=274&t=11362

Probably due to the nature and stupidity of the the member who deprived another cruiser of their luggage. 

May Quote of the Month

Solent Richard and many Facebook friends have been rather amused followers of Duetto Staines‘ daily CD Blog while he has been on board Queen Victoria on her World Cruise. It’s hardly been riveting stuff compared with another blog on the same full World Cruise…

http://exitviathegiftshop.blogspot.co.uk/?view=magazine

…which additionally contains hundreds of excellent photographs.But hey, it’s provided considerable degree of mirth.

So it was more than interesting to see another CD member and old chum of Solent Richard, JohnR, Chippenham start a thread entitled “Time for a New Slot”…

https://www.cruise.co.uk/forum/508-cruises-rants/46847-time-new-slot.html

Just 17 minutes after it started this little gem appeared…

Blogs an integral part of Forum

“…blogs are an integral part of our forum…”

Really? One wonders at the mysterious silence that reigned between Hong Kong and Capetown on the same cruise. You couldn’t make it up.

No fond Farewell

Breaking News. 17 March 2016

It has been brought to Solent Richard’s notice that James Crossland appears to have jumped ship from the CruiseDot and has moved to https://www.jtatravel.co.uk/profile.php.

Interesting times. Did he jump or was James pushed?  Having been at the helm of the CD forum during its fall from grace heaven knows what the company’s corporate bankers will demand next.

Even more disturbing is that James, ever popular amongst the forum luvvies, has had no forum epitaph, no fond farewell and no good wishes. Infact the square root of FA as if the poor chap has been air-brushed from history.

In the immortal words of Windsor Davies…“Oh dear, how sad, never mind“.

One thing is for sure though. James certainly knows where the odd skeleton is buried and might just be inclined to share a few secrets with you know who.

 

 

“Another current and noticeable absence from the ‘friendly community site’ is any mention of a meeting between two of the friendly forum’s most prolific posters, one notable by absence  for some time from the forum while Duetto is regularly making daily updates on his world cruise but no mention of any invitation yet for drinks in a Queens Grill suite with the fellow member or members of Solent Richard’s We are Cunard fanzine. How odd”.

The power of the internet is truly amazing and to a lesser extent, this blog. Incredibly, less than 10 hours after posting the above comment,  a cryptic message appeared on the next days blog effectively confirming the above comment had been passed on.

Even better, 24 hours later, the Queens Grill silence was broken on the arrival at Cape Town.

6 responses to “Cruises.co.uk

  1. Richard I love your blog, your reviews are excellent and I respect your cruise opinions. I am however disappointed that you see fit to engage in this type of post on your own blog or not. I have no hesitation in completing my full correct details using no aliases for this comment. In my world those with integrity stand tall and be counted.

  2. Thank you Richard. I do so hope that you will post more soon. In particular more on any Carribean ports and what to see. I travel solo (no moans about supplements from me too long running a very successful company not to live in the real market orientated world) and worry somewhat about safety. Despite being a very trim 60 I doubt I would attract sex slavers but just need to consider where is safe for me alone

  3. Hello Richard,
    Just catching up and have to say two things :
    1) You do provide in your personal style simply the facts on the places and ships you have been blessed to be on. Your photos compliment your reviews which are a great background for us wanting to learn more.

    2) As you know having been a more active member of CD and others over the last few years I tend to use Facebook and other forums to avoid some of the needless criticism I have seen. In terms of your personal blog, it is your blog and you are entitled to narrate whatever you elect to as long as it is not offensive and in a polite way. This you do fully , thank you.
    It does not take much effort as you know to know the person behind an alias and your blog provides the information.

    All the best / Rob

  4. Pingback: Cruising Mates | Solent Richard's Cruise Blog·

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